I took a deep breath and swallowed
hard trying to rid myself of the
fear that found a home
blocking my throat.
Words forgotten the moment they left my lips and you stared right
through me. I watched your mind
tracing every action and reaction you’ve ever seen that wasn’t the
straight girl aesthetic.
“You really need to think about this”
That’s what you managed to say.
My hands shake with every sound you make
I do nothing but think
I wouldn’t crumble your world with this news if I didn’t think
I can’t think anymore
“This is a burden I don’t want you to carry”
I am a burden
You are burdened
But my life isn’t a crime committed in the dead of night with loaded guns and ski masks
My life is not a sex scene in that movie you thought was kid-friendly
I shouldn’t have to bury my face in the sleeves of my hoodie
I shouldn’t have to make up a comfy chair and carefully choose my words
I shouldn’t have to avoid eye contact with the girl across the room because I do not have a
dick between my legs
“Are you sure?”
Do you think I’m fucking sure?
Do I need to provide a folder of evidence for you?
Should I film the intimate nights in a dimly lit room?
Do you want to be in that room when we brush against each other’s bare skin?
Would that prove it to you?
Think. Burden. Think. Burden
“Maybe it’s just her…”
Actually it is her.
That’s the fucking point.
Maybe I love her.
Maybe I love girls.
“Why don’t you try…”
No I will not try to fit into your mold.
No I will not pretend for the comfort of those who can’t see past who I
fuck to see that I am a real person.
I am a person.
Please understand that.